new thing i learned just now: in like 400 AD there was a monk named simeon stylites who used to live in a one room cell with a window but too many people kept bugging him for religious advice, so he climbed to the top of a pillar and shackled himself to it until he died 37 years later.

this became a cool new trend to the point where there were enough pillar monks of varying viewpoints that they would scream at each other all day

Do you think stone age people held funerals for their dogs? They buried their dead, that we know. Some were buried with their dogs, so wherever their dead would go, with their bows and arrows and bone flutes, clearly they figured that it's better for the dogs to follow to wherever the departed will go. But people outlive their dogs more often than dogs outlive their people. Did they figure that whatever is beyond, dogs go to the same place that people do?

Before stone houses, cattle, barley or rice, before people came up with the marks that the people now like to call marks of "civilisation", they had stone axes, bone spears and dogs. No other animal would willingly climb to a human's bed to sleep on their feet, or rest their chin on your knee to look you in the eyes while begging for food when they've already been fed. Did they laugh when a dog was clever enough to wriggle its way out of a tethered leash to get into venison that was being smoked for winter, or wake their people up by the tap of a wagging tail after reluctantly accepting that they aren't allowed to bark them awake?

Did they ever pause in the middle of a story at the fire at night, to turn and watch one of the dogs mutter barks and twitch paws in their sleep? Whatever they thought that dreams were, they knew dogs have them too. Did they wonder what dogs dream of? Visions of past and future hunts? If they thought that dreams were another realm, where your soul will sometimes visit while leaving your body behind, where does the soul of a dog go?

Did they wonder where the souls of dogs go?

party at my place we're gonna drink expired beverages and tremble

oh no cigarettes for me thanks i just wanted to be in this dank alleyway with you

The way I lift with my legs and not my back makes all the ladies in the warehouse swoon

made a silly meme in a burst of sugar-fueled inspiration, and I thought tumblr might appreciate it so here u go

One of the worst parts of current internet culture is that it makes good old fashioned complaining so difficult. I don’t wanna cancel anyone or bully anyone, I’m not trying to form a hate mob I’m not calling anyone out, i just wanna bitch about something. Because complaining is fun, good for you, even. Is that too much to ask? Where is the room for shooting the shit?

fun fact! did you know that you can gain extra ‘forbidden time’ by staying up late in the night? but Watch Out

Shit this is great! You can get so much done if you don't sleep!

THE CONSEQUENCES

enough about my guts

it’s time i rearrange his penis.!!!

on it boss!